NO LAUGHING MATTER

 A wood burning stove is perfect for a pot-roast.                                                                                                       Mans

Now that I hopefully have got your attention and the dust has settled, after my naked butt post, I would like to touch on something deadly serious and what it boils down to is SUSTAINABILITY.

The big kettle that goes into the  
Wonder Bag ready for the morning
dishes

So here I am, running around foraging, hosting get togethers, writing blogs, making videos and generally having a jolly hockey stix good time, but there is a deeper reason for it all.  I believe that a time will eventually come, when it will be possible for people living in cities to become sustainable in just about all respects, by that I mean with regards to food, energy, water and waste disposal. I don’t believe there is any other alternative, if we are to survive as a global society. I hope to encourage as many of  you as I can to think along these lines.

My mission, as ‘The Urban Hunter Gatherer’, is to try to work towards being as self-sustainable as possible, while living only a 20 minute walk from the very centre of Cape Town. I’m not flippant about my pledge and I don’t expect to make radical inroads into sustainable living, but if each year I’m more sustainable than the one before, then at least I’ll feel I’m moving in the right direction. For me it all starts with food. Why buy imported and unseasonal produce, why jam your massive fridges full with stuff when you end up throwing half of it away. Why not grow our own produce or at least some of it (you don’t need a big area, you know), why not start a compost heap or worm farm, why not reuse your jars, bottles, plastic containers and packets. Wot about a basic grey water system, and rainwater tanks to reduce your sewage output and to reduce your use of municipal water. Then there is cooking and heating with solar energy, using ‘a wonder bag’ and even using a wood burning stove that doubles up as a heater (as long as you use the right woods – I believe this is a sustainable approach). Most of the things I have mentioned, don’t require buckets of money, they are small little changes that most of us can do.

                                    

The Wonder Bag, awesome for rice, beens, slow-cook stews etc.      Me

Me mate Dave's solar cooker that he lent me. It's brilliant.               Mans

Yes, dealing with all this stuff is a little more time consuming than taking the consumer approach, but it's rather rewarding and in any case we all need to slow down, don't we?

LIVING UNDER A LEMON TREE

Butt naked with hose in hand doing tree maintenance                                              Mans (poor dude)

I have got this amazing lemon tree, in my garden, which is a source of edibles, shade, fragrance, firewood, hanging points, but mostly it’s a source of jolly good vibes. I love my house hugely, but I’m not sure if I would have bought it, were it not for the lemon tree. Soon after I moved in, I had a combined house warming and friends birthday, we hosted a ‘beeeg’ party, where 60 of Cape Towns’ finest and a few Cape Towns’ not so finest, came to enjoy the celebrations. The festivities went on until the wee hours of the mornings. At some point I vaguely remember a small unruly mob picking the lemons off the ground and lobbing them onto the roofs of my non-drinking Muslim neighbours.

The finest spot at my spot            Mans

The first year I lived at ‘91 Upper’, I took bags of lemons to those neighbours, who graciously accepted and never mentioned the ‘uncouth volley of lemons’ that inconsiderately woke them up at an unmentionable hour, only a few weeks before. Wotz more, I received jars of yummy lemon atchar and lemonade. It was then, that I realised that, I had moved into the right hood.

I’m embarrassed to say, that was the last time that I took lemons to my tolerant neighbours. You see, the next year the tree developed some nasty little disease, that coated the young leaves with ’a white fuzzy sticky stuff’, which I’ve been led to believe is ‘Australian White Fly’ (“those bloody Ozzies!”). Anyhow I didn’t want to spray it with poison, so I used non-toxic Oleum. This caused petal drop and not one lemon came from the tree that year. Still not wanting to use toxins, I discovered that if I regularly sprayed the tree with a high-pressure garden hose, I could manage the disease quite well. So I have a little weekly routine, where head off into the garden butt naked, with my hose in hand (No! it’s not what you’re thinking) to deal with the ‘White Fly’.

Ever since I started writing my cookbook ‘The Urban Hunter Gatherer’ I have selfishly consumed or processed every lemon that this wonderful tree has had to offer, all in the name of education and experimentation. It’s been quite a learning curve. I’ve made heaps of dishes that include lemons, like lemonade, lemon syrup, lemon marmalade, lemon ice-cream, lemon sorbet, lemon dressings, candied lemon, limoncello, lemon tarts, lemon surprise pudding (a Nigel Slater Classic), lemon curd and a whole lot of other stuff, that I have not mentioned, although I’m yet to make a lemon meringue pie. My only regret I have about my lemon education, is that my kindly neighbours are losing out. In fact I think I’ll spread the love right now and give out all the jars of lemon curd that I have lurking in the fridge. I kid you not, when I press the full stop to end this blog, thatz wot’ll do…

Lemons, lemons, lemons...                                                                    Mans

TAKE STOCK

A chicken stock, perfect for braises, risottos, stews and soups                                                                             Me

Nothing beats a good stock, it can really make a dish. Homemade stocks are definitely best, but I‘m not one of those who turns their nose up at a stock cube, if that’s all you have time for, I say, ‘go for it’.

I can’t have my say about stock without having a giggle at my friend Anton’s expense.

Anton is a gentle giant who is as down to earth as a bloke can get.  When it comes to a chow, he is also pretty down to earth, the type who doesn’t get caught up in all that fancy food malarkey.

One fine day, Anton thought, ‘today is a good day to make my first stock’. Now Anton had heard that the longer the bones bubble away, the more intense the flavour would be. So Anton patiently let the stock simmer away and every now and then he would add a bit more water. Such was Anton’s patience and desire for perfection, that one fine day, turned into two fine days, but the third day was the opposite of fine, coz when flavours had intensified to a ridiculous deliciousness, Anton prepared for the final process. He placed a colander in the sink, and with excitement was reaching fever pitch, he tilted the stockpot over the strainer and poured the precious liquid down the drain and kept the bones. What a silly man!

This is my Basic Stock Recipe.

Wot you need

- any one of the following: chicken carcass/crayfish shells/whatever bones are left after Sunday’s roast / fish skeleton, heads, tail and fins / tough mushroom stems – you get the point (if you have got a section of white wine left over for the party the night before pour it in too, or half a lemon, use up whatever is around, but do AVOID potatoes, turnips, butternut - basically anything that will make the stock cloudy. Also DON’T add any of the Brassica family broccoli, cabbage and cauliflower, coz long cooking makes them stink.)

-  water

- 1 large carrot sliced

- 1 head of sliced celery, leaves and all

- 1 large onion chopped

- a few cloves of garlic

- 1 leek sliced (only, if you’ve got)

- a couple of bay leaves

- a sprig of thyme

- about 8 whole peppercorns

- some parsley, stalks and all (only, if you’ve got)

- a few bay leaves

A crayfish stock, so good in chicken pot roast.            Me

Wot to do

 If you want to go the extra mile, roast the bones in the oven at 180°c for about 20mins, but it’s no train smash if you don’t. Chuck all the ingredients into a large pot (if you don’t have all the ingredients, don’t worry, coz the sun will still rise tomorrow, and in any case, it’s your stock and you make the rules) and pour in water until everything is well covered.  Bring to a simmer and spoon off the scum when necessary. Simmer for a few hours, if you have got the time, or less, if you don’t. If you are making a fish stock don’t simmer for longer than 20 mins, coz it’ll go cloudy. You may need to add a bit more water, if it’s looking a bit dry. When you get the feeling that ‘it’s time’, strain through a sieve. Just remember to catch your precious liquid, which you can refrigerate or freeze until needed.

SPAGHETTI CARBONARA

Stir like crazy                                                                                                                                                              Mans

This is a really useful recipe to know, coz most kitchens will have the necessary. It’s a perfect dish for when you are tiered and lazy, or when you have to make a quick plan to feed unexpected guests. It’s especially great for when you and your mates come home at daybreak, after a bender, coz it’s immediate and a bit like eating a bacon and egg breky.

I’m about to go off on a tangent again, so skip to the recipe if you find me boring. This storey features the Legendary E-man, who is always having key epics.

A couple of mates and I were on some or other mission, when we arrived to collect the E to join us; he excitedly opened the door, only to discover that he had lost the keys to the security gate. It wasn’t long before fold up chairs and tea was passed through the gaps in the gate and we were having a splendid time, the E on one side of the gate and the three of us on the other.

Now a person can only drink so much tea, so we sensibly moved onto beer and started having an even better time. Soon our ‘hungies’ started hanging out, so E disappeared into the kitchen and it wasn’t long before he reappeared with bowls of steaming Spaghetti Carbonara. Our great excitement quickly turned to intense disappointment, when we realised the bowls couldn’t fit through the gate’s vertical slots. I had this disturbing vision of a very happy and fat E on the one side of the gate and a very miserable and skinny, three of us on the opposite side.

Unfazed, the ever Zen E, tipped all the pasta back into the pan, turned the bowls sideways, posted them through the slots and preceded to dish up through the gate. A carbonara is yet to taste so good.

That’s the thing about the E, he takes life’s bothers with a light and loving heart and soon those hiccups turn into the most delightful adventures. I can’t wait for him to loose his keys again.

Wot you'll need                                                                                       Mans

This is how the E-man taught me to make a Spaghetti Carbonara for 4-6 people

Wot you need

- Box (500g) of spaghetti

- A glug of olive oil

- 8/10 slices of bacon/pancetta (there are no rules, throw in more if you want)

-  About 4 eggs lightly beaten with a fork

- Grated pecorino/parmigano cheese (pecorino is preferable)

- Chives/parsley (optional - chives always go down well with eggs and bacon)

- Salt and pepper to taste

 Wot to do

Get a generous pot of water with plenty of salt on the go for the spaghetti. While it’s waiting to boil, chop up your bacon/pancetta into little pieces and fry them with a glug of olive oil, on a low heat. When the pasta water is boiling, add the spaghetti and give it a good stir to stop it from sticking. Turn off the pan, when the bacon/pancetta is crispy. About now, the pasta should be close to aldente, when it is, schnabb with some tongs or a one of those spaghetti spoon thingies and put in the bacon/pancetta pan. Don’t fuss if the pasta isn’t well drained, coz you want a bit of pasta water. Pour in the eggs and stir like crazy. The trick is to get the temperature of the pan just right – if it’s too hot, the eggs will scramble, if it’s too cold, you’ll have the unpleasant business of dealing with runny raw eggs. Add some pasta water, a little at a time and the cheese, until the dish is creamy but not watery. It might take you a go or two, to figure the dish out, but once you do, you’ll be proudly puffing out you chest every time. (It’s definitely worth botching it up a few times before you get it right). Finally mix in the chives/parsley.

Don’t dilly-dally when you make this dish, coz it getz cold in the blink of an eye, so get it to the table pronto.